I have had a lot of conversations with people about how God has led me to do things, say things, or even go places – all of which I would have never thought of doing myself.
I guess when you tell someone that God told you to do something, it can leave your audience puzzled.
Often what I see is a look of confusion, quickly followed by a very weird smile. That person is nodding their head, hearing what I’m saying, yet everything inside them is screaming, “She is a nut job!”
Now, don’t get me wrong. I don’t really blame them. Before I started to recognize God’s voice, I would have thought the very same thing.
I remember hearing some TV Pastor saying that God said this or that, and I thought, “What a phony! Only crazy people hear from God!”
The first time I really believed that God was speaking to me; I thought I was going crazy!
I thought, “Why in the world would God ever speak to me? I’m so unimportant! Shouldn’t He be speaking to someone who is powerful, more educated, influential, or famous, like Oprah?”
If God needs to talk to someone, then it should be her and not me!
Every time I thought I heard God’s voice, I would think I am going insane. I would try to shake it off as just my imagination.
I think we have been taught that God is too busy to engage in conversation with His children or that He only chooses special and anointed individuals to share His heart.
I began to reminisce about the important decisions in my life, and soon I discovered God played an integral part of it!
I know that this gently voice told me to me to apply for a waitressing job at a comedy club. Now, that might not sound important, but this allowed me to meet the most important man in my life – my husband! That whisper also gave me confirmation that brought us to our current home. I was warned and protected many times by that whispering thoughts. The names of both of my children were those gentle whispers into my mind.
Yes, those whispers were God and He was always talking to me, I just never realized it.
When I got this revelation my life changed. I decided that if God’s has been so involved in my life-changing events, then maybe I should start to listen.
The truth is that God wants to talk to everyone! We are His children, and what kind of a Father would He be, if He didn’t communicate with us?
I began to pray more and just sit quietly, anticipating that I would hear from God and surprisingly I did! The more I would hear Him, the more I would expected it. The more I expected the more I would hear.
I have never heard the audible voice of God at least not yet. I have read that there are some people who have heard the audible voice of God, but for me it’s a still small whispering voice in my head.
God speaks through my thoughts, imagination and my inner monologue. Sometimes it’s a random thought or an answer to a question, before I could even say it out loud. It’s a feeling deep in my soul that calls out to me. Some say it’s like a kind of “knowing” that you just can’t explain. The difference between my inner thoughts and God’s voice is in one word – comforting.
Once I started to recognize His voice I began to ask all the questions any person would ask God?
I believe I first started to hear God’s voice at a very young age. I’m not quite sure when exactly, but as I start to reflect, I believe it’s been through my entire life.
I remember playing a game with my sister Tina, where we would “call Heaven” and talk to God. I must have been 6 or 7-years-old, and we would play this game often.
It’s amazing to think that I actually believed that I could “call Heaven,” as a little girl! Why did I think that I could call Heaven? Did I really believe that the God of the universe would play telephone with 2 little girls?
It says in Mark 10:15 NLT, “I tell you the truth, anyone who doesn’t receive the Kingdom of God like a child will never enter it.”
For whatever the reason, I really enjoyed talking to God as a child.
As I grew up, I prayed to God, but I never really expected an answer. I was busy with my life, and I would only pray out of obligation or because a crisis would arise.
After my mother was burned in a house fire in 2002, my relationship with God changed.
God healed my mother, even though doctors doubted she would live through the 7 surgeries.
I started to hear Him again. He walked me through each surgery telling me that she was going to live. After my mother was released from the hospital and the crisis averted, I went back to life as usual (just praying at night).
I thought my relationship with God was great, but it was a one-sided relationship. God wanted me to go deeper with Him, and so He drew me closer to Him.
My life started to fall apart. Every which way I turned, my world was turning upside down, and I felt like I was talking to the ceiling when I actually did pray.
I came to the end of my rope, and I surrendered myself to God.
I knew I needed more, and I was going to find my God that was always there for me.
I started to delve into the Bible, desperately trying to find that switch that would allow me to hear from Him again.
I watched TV shows about this God that had conversations and gave people visions. That’s what I really wanted!
Maybe it’s because that little girl who once played telephone with her Creator never wanted to stop hearing His voice, or perhaps God just wanted to start a new conversation with me.
For whatever the reason, in 2009 a switch was turned on; I started to hear from God again!
This time it was different. This wasn’t me praying simply to ask for anything; this was getting to know my Father for the very first time.
At first I would read a verse in the Bible and within a few moments I would have a clear understanding.
Another time while I was on a plane to Hawaii, nervousness set in after hitting some turbulence, and I began worrying the plane was going to crash. All of a sudden, that still small voice said, “If this plane crashes what glory would I get?” What God said really made sense, and He completely calmed my fear!
The more time I would spend with Him the more I would hear Him.
The very first time God gave me an assignment, I allowed my mind to challenge it. God is so patient with me, but this time He was very stern, just like any good Father should be. After questioning Him on what He wanted me to do, the opportunity slipped away. Defeated, I heard Him say, “When I tell you to go, GO!”
Just as I thought, I failed my Father, He brought that opportunity right back, and this time I listened.
Since then, I have done all the Lord has asked me to do. Some of the assignments have been very strange things that God has asked me to carry out. I just don’t question it because regardless how bizarre it may look to God it’s the perfect solution.
I have had the privilege to tell people very intimate things about their life, to pray for people who had cancer, hug people as they cried out to God, and I even was prompted to tell someone that they tried to kill themselves, in order to draw them closer to the Father. At times, it has been overwhelming and quite draining.
In all of this, the humor of God is addictive, and His love amazing.
I once asked God, “Lord, people say that I shouldn’t hear from You all the time. Is that true”? He responded, “I spoke to Moses all of the time!” Call me crazy, but that still small voice just made me smile!